Which Hogwarts House are Dan and Phil?! – POTTERMORE
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Which Hogwarts House are Dan and Phil?! – POTTERMORE


Phil: You’re a wizard, Danny! Dan: I’m a what? P: You’re a wizard! D: I’m a what?
P: [laughing] You’re a wizard! D: I’m not a wizard, I’m just Harry. P: You’re a…. fffflippin’ wizard! P: Hello DanAndPhilGames Wizards!
D: Ho Ho Hogwarts! D: Sorry. I won that. Mine was much better than that. I was prepared.
P: Nice! You win with that one by miles. Yeah. D: And welcome back to Day 2 of….
P: (sounding like an old man) GAMINGMASSS! D: That was…
P: That was the theme tune. [laughs]
D: That was… [chuckles] D: Two days in a row. Look at us!
P: Look at it goin’
D: And what are we doing today Phil? D: Phil in a snazzy scarf!
P: Well, we’re British. We’re probably secretly wizards. P: So a lot of people be like, “Phil! Dan! What Hogwarts house are you?!” D: Because the Pottermore hat sorting quiz (P: Yeah) is a big deal. P: It’s a big thing.
D: It says a lot about you personally. Phil: It shapes you as a person.
D: Now we both did this like a billion years ago (P: A long time ago) when it first came out, but– P: I think you might have corrupted me and brought me onto another house. D: Well.. Okay.. P: Because I’ve been around you so long I feel like some of the Slytherin has seeped into me from you. D: Maybe your answers will have changed. (P: Maybe!) Maybe the quiz has gotten better. D: But now for you, for YouTube, we are going to sort ourselves into Hogwart houses. D: So I hope you’re ready because this is gonna go deep into our personalities, okay?
P: Yeah! D: Our Pot-Pot-Potternalities. (P: Potternalities!) That didn’t work. P: I think I’m Hufflepuff from last time, which I have the scarf for, so I’m going to feel betrayed if I’ve (D: Which is very ironic) moved houses! D: As they say Hufflepuffs are good at finding things
P: I’m terrible at finding things! D: and Phil loses things and never bothers to find them
P: I lose myself. P: [badly mimics the intro to Lose Yourself by Eminem] (D: Who wants to go first?) I almost did some Eminem then. D: Was that your impression of the start of Lose Yourself? Christ.
P: [laughing] Yeah! D: Eminem is rolling in his grave!
(Eminem is not dead, Dan) P: [singing to the tune of Rolling in the Deep by Adele] Rolling in the graaaAAaave! P: I’ll go first, because I think I’m a Hufflepuff. D: [gravely] BEGIN THE EXPERIENCE (P: Alright!) D: This ain’t– this ain’t no Buzzfeed quiz, (P: This is an experience) this is an experience! P: I’m gonna get sucked into the TV and stroked by J.K. Rowling (Woah, Phil.) P: LET’S GOOO! P: Oh my god. Forest or river? D: This is the first one, Phil. P: I’m already conflicted, because forests are a bit scary but rivers are wet and I don’t like having wet socks, so… [laughs] D: I mean are you getting in the river or are you walking next to it?
P: Wait let me see a minute. D: If you were to go for a walk, would you go for a walk through a forest or by a river? [mysterious music plays]
P: [sighs conflictedly] [both laugh]
D: Guys, we’ve already hit a roadblock.
P: I’m so indecisive! P: Welcome to the 27 hour video.
D: I’m sorry. Right down the middle! P: Forest has more creatures that I like, but I feel like I’d fall in the river, so I’m gonna go with forest. *children cheering sound effect*
D: Okay, we got there guys. D: Okay, P: Oh my gosh D: I’ll read this one for you.
P: Okay. D: Went straight from “River or forest?” straight to D: [dramatic music] A troll has gone berzerk in the headmaster’s study at Hogwarts. (P: Whuh-oh) D: It is about to smash crash and tear several irreplaceable items and treasures. D: In which order P: Yeah? D: Would you rescue these objects? D: Oh so it’s the the old “Who would you save from a fire?” question.
P: Okay here we go. D: So your objects that you can save are: a nearly perfected cure for dragon pox– which one may assume is–is really bad– P: It might be fun having dragon pox
D: Unless you’re a scaley. P: have a little itch, have a little fly.
D: In which case they go to parties to get it. {DANIEL} D: Student records going back a thousand years
P: Nyeh, who cares about that. D: If you want to creep on your peers (P: Ooo!) you’ll be like, “Well, you insulted me. You’re great-great-grandma did this with Toby Slytherin!” *snaps* P: It’s like Hogwarts Facebook. (D: Exactly!) Hello, Cedric!
D: Hogbook *bah dum tss* (P: Yeah.) D: Or finally, a mysterious, handwritten–
creepy fact-o– book full of strange runes. P: Well I feel like if I read that I’m gonna get cursed and turned into a centaur. (D: Definitely!) D: So what do you care about the most?
P: I want the Hogwarts book! D: Okay what do you care about the least?
P: The runes book. P: Alright this one! D: Phil if you were attending Hogwarts, which pet would you choose to take with you? P: Definitely not a lynx, am I right? [*ad, dramatic music*
D: Too soon. P: *laughing* Too soon. D: Okay, let’s click away from tabby cat ASAP!
P: Uh, nope! P: Tabby cat, siamese cat, GINGER CAT?!
D: [chuckles] P: I feel like I’m a ginger cat at heart. I think you’re a black cat. D: They’re good– okay thank you. (P: Yeah) Right. Sure. D: I’ll run across the road just to spite you.
P: White cat, tawn– now we’re at it! D: Owl station.
P: Owl land. D & P: A screech owl!
P: *screeches* D: That sounds like you. Yeah, okay.
P: That’s me first thing in the morning. P: Haven’t had any coffee? I am a screech owl.
D: Me playing a horror game.{accurate} P: Uh.. brown owl? I mean, boring!
D: How now, brown owl? P: Snowy owls are super cute!
D: That is good. Isn’t Hedwig a snowy owl? (P: Yeah.) Or is he a barn owl? I don’t know. P: I’m very overwhelmed. I thought I’d have like three options.
D: You’re very owl-verwhelmed. P: OHHHH!
D: Well, Phil, they want people to feel completely, you know, represented here. P: Who is gonna choose a toad? [chuckles]
D: Ron. Fight me! {It’s Neville} D: Cat, toad, or owl?
P: OWL! D: Which kind of owl?
P: Snowy owl!
D: There you go. Select. P: That’s the one I feel in my heart.
D: Okay. Fwuh–it’s getting mystical. D: Philip– P: Four goblets! D: Are placed before you, which would you choose to drink? D: The foaming, frothing silvery liquid that sparkles as though containing ground diamonds, P: OOOO! P: I wonder what that would do to me? Give me like rock hard abs? D: Sounds like unicorn blood, which didn’t work out for Voldemort D: The smooth, thick– (Both: thicc) richly purple drink that gives off the delicious smell of chocolate and plums. (P: Mmm!) P: That sounds quite festive.
D: That just sounds like mulled wine or something. D: The golden liquid so bright that it hurts the eye P: Uh, what? D: -and which makes sunspots dance around all the room. P: That sounds like some kind of illegal drug.
D: I was literally about to say that. (P: Yeah) D: Or the mysterious black liquid that gleams like ink and gives off fumes that make you see strange visions P: It’s Dan’s blood! Uhhhh… I’m gonna go for that one.
D: I feel attacked I don’t know why you’re coming for me. P: Chocolatey- plums
D: He’s going for the Ribena. D: Okay.
P: Sign this laddie up. D: Jesus Christ, okay. I hope you-you’ve got your affairs in order. Phil, after you’ve DIED. P: WHAT?! D: What would you like most people to do when they hear your name? P: *splutters* C’mon! D: Miss you, but smile, ask for more stories about your adventures, P: What story are you asking about?
D: Have I told you the story about the time Phil ate the last of my… [croaking] cereal? P: Don’t start! D: Think with admiration of your achievements. (P: Awww.) Ha Ha! That’s not gonna be it. D: I don’t care what people think of me after I’m dead, it’s what they think when I’m alive that counts. P: OOO! Calm down, sassy oat! P: I’m gonna go with the first one. Miss me, but smile.
D: Boring! D: Phil! (P: [laughs]) What are you most looking forward to learning at Hogwarts? P: I want to be able to be really large and smash up castles. *Attack on Titan theme song* D: I don’t know if that ever happened in Harry Potter.
P: It did in my fanfiction. P: Right. What’s happening?
D: The Hermione stomach inflation fic. Phil wrote it. D: It’s on Tumblr.
P: Apparition and dissapropropriation. D: Transfiguration! Turning something into another thing.
P: Ohh! D: Flying on a broomstick D: Hexes and jinxes!
P: [chuckles] You say that in a happy way. D: Magical creatures and how to befriend/care for them.
P: Well I’m already friend’s with this rat, so that’s alright! D: [snorts]
P: Squeak, squeak! D: Wow okay.
P: That sounded more like a hog rat. D: Well I’d rather you–erm. Anyway mate I’m just putting that out there. D: Uh secrets about the castle! P: Oof! D: Lame! D: Or every area of magic I can. P: That’s Hermione. D: Okay, Hermione. D: Jesus.
P: Uhh.. I want to know about the magical creatures. That’s my favorite part of Harry Potter. D: Yeah, true.
P: All the animals and shizz. D: You and two friends– Sorry, Phil, I don’t think you– (P: I don’t have two friends) you miss out on this question. D: Need to cross a bridge guarded by a river troll (P: Uh oh!)– good thing you went to the forest!– (P:Yeah) D: Who insists on fight– “Fight me! IRL!” said the troll– in order to let you pass (P: Yeah) D: Do you: Confuse it– wow that would just be you just having a conversation, with the troll (P: [chuckles]) being like “Get me outta here!”– D: Suggest drawing lots to decide which of you will fight…
P: That’s very methodical. D: It is. Decide that all of you should fight, or volunteer? Not that. P: I would confuse the troll with my sense of mystery.
D: Right. D: Left or right?
P: If I’m playing a video game I always go down the right hand path. D: Now, Phil. You don’t know directions, so are you sure you mean right? P: This is the right. (D: So is that what– okay.) This is my right hand though D: Just–just checking that you understa–
P: I’ll use to slap you in the– face! D: So are you ready, Phil? (P: I’m not! I’m not ready!) When I click this we’re gonna find out. [drum roll]
P: If it says Slytherin, I’m calling the police. [drum roll]
D: What is this offense?! Okay. 3, 2, 1 [Legend of Zelda treasure chest sound]
P: AYYYY!!! P: I can keep the scarf!
D: I can’t belie–you ARE a Hufflepuff! P: I AM a Hufflepuff!
D: Have they ch– D: I swear it’s not the same as like what? Like 8 years ago?
P: I feel like it was different questions (D: Yeah) P: Badger pride! D: You’re like (P: I am a badger) all the stereotypes of a Hufflepuff without like the good aspects of a Hufflepuff. D: Like being a reliable friend or finding things.
P: Which is finding things P: I know! You– I’m gonna close my eyes– you change something in this room and I’ll figure out what’s changed. P: Okay? (D: Sure.) And then we’ll work out if I’m a good finder. P: You can play at home as well. Close your eyes with me. Lookin’ at the thing. P: 3, 2, 1, eyes closed! [Mariachi band band music plays]
P: I’m not listening either. D: Go on then.
P: Have you done it?
D: Mmhmm. [detective music plays]
P: Umm… [laughs] it looks exactly the same! P: Wait…
D: [whispers] 10… 9…
P: No! Wait wait wait! P: You swapped the stockings around? P: Ummm… You swapped the cushions around? P: What?! What have you done?? [laughs] I don’t know!
D: I turned the lights on the Christmas presents off!
P: OHHHH! [fail sound effect]
P: I’m not used to the Christmas presents yet! P: They’re new my life!
D: You put them there! P: Ohhh! Was that ’cause it was a big thing hiding in plain sight?
D: [mocking] Oh who knows? D: All I know is he didn’t do it! Alright don’t attack the mouse!
P: Badgers eat mice for breakfast, matie! P: Alright, Dan!
D: I’m ready! P: [singing] Begin the experience! P: What are you hoping to be?
D: Your mum
P: OHHHHH!! D: I don’t know, Phil! I’m not going in with expectations, I’m just gonna–
P: Yours is different to mine! D: Amazing!
P: Moon or stars? D: Shit! What does that mean? P: Do you want to moon someone or do you want to stars someone? D: I don’t want to know what that means, but I got an idea.
P: [laughs] Something bad probably. D: Probably means something. D: Well, (P: [singing] City of moooons.) the moon is quite mysterious and beautiful (P: Yeah) and magical D: But then I really like–like space and science and stuff like that (P: Yeah?) D: I’m gonna go with sssssstars, even though I feel like moon is edgier. P: [singing] Staaaars. P: When I was a kid apparently I spent a 6 hour ferry journey just going, “Where’s the moon gone? There’s the moon! Where’s the moon gone?” P: And my parents wanted to give me some sleeping medication because I did it for an entire six hours. D: Did they give you the sleeping medication?
P: No! D: A bit too much to have when you were younger? (P: I th– [laughs]) It would explain a lot. P: Listen! One of your housemates has cheeated in a Hogwarts exam by using a (D: Scandalous!) self-spelling quill. D: Oh my god, rookie mistake! P: Now he has come to the class in charms (D: Who are you gonna fool?) beating you into second place! P: Professor (D: That’s okay.) Flitwick– I almost said that wrong– is suspicious of what happened. D: Professor *beep* *beep*– I mean (P: You can’t say that!) what were you afraid you were gonna say there? P: I’m gonna bleep that! P: He draws you to one side after his lesson and asks you whether or not your classmate used a forbidden quill D: He obviously knows! (P: What do you do?) For Godsake, okay. P: Are you gonna dog me in? (D: Well, I’m– yeah, you?) Look, yeah, I didn’t revise. I was busy… finding things… in my house. D: I hope you go try and find something in the Forbidden Forest P: Oh, I hope you–
D: and get killed! P: Oh my gosh! D: I’m not a very competitive person. I will happily always let my friends win at games. (Are you sure about that, Dan?) D: I’ll just throw them under the bus and say it’s not my problem. D: I like that one ’cause it’s basically saying to your friend, “You should probably tell him, ’cause he’s totally onto you.” P: Ohhh!
D: It’s not like doing it– ’cause it’s like, if you’ve got a best friend, you don’t want to betray them. P: Yeah.
D: but if they’ve done something, then you kinda have to own up to it. D: Your best friend shouldn’t put you in a position when they have to lie! P: Well alright!
D: And stuff like that! So I say this one ’cause it’s like, “Mate, sort your own mess out.” P: Go for it! P: Which would you rather be? Envied?
D: Hmmm.. what’s that like? P: Imitated?
D: HMMM.. What’s THAT like? P: Trusted?
D: Haha.. mmm.. P: [singing] Praised?
D: [sarcastically] Definitely praised. P: Liked?
D: Oooo.. P: Or feared?
Both: [sinisterly] HAHAHA! D: If that’s the Slytherin answer, I’m sorry but that’s too like– okay. P: I feel like this one is the most into a personality we’ve got so far. P: I’m very interested.
D: Is anyone gonna be honest– D: Everyone’s just gonna be like, “I just wanna be friendly!” when they’re all like horrible people. D: Okay. I just want to be liked!
P: Awww! P: Given the choice, would you rather invent a potion that would guarantee you: P: [exaggerated] Looooove? (D: Creepy.) Bow chicka–Glory? D: [in an accent] Bow chicka glory! (P: Glory!) P: Wisdom! (D: Mmm.) You need some of that. (D: That’d be pretty fun.) P: [deeply] Or power?
D: Okay, what does power mean? Does that mean like, “Yeah, I can shoot lightning out of my hands!” P: That means you can turn into the giant!
D: Well, that’s like… all of these things are a bit genie wish sounding. D: It’s like you get glory, but for what?
P: Yeah D: Maybe it’ll just be the person made you do something horrible and all of the wrong kind of people like you for it. D: So maybe– what was the third one?
P: Wisdom. D: I’m gonna go with wisdom.
P: And what are you gonna learn? D: I’d be that person that responds to Facebook comments going, “[snorts] Um, actually!” (P: Actually!) on everything. P: Oh no, you’ve got the pet one!
D: Owl! (P: Owl.) D: Come on!
P: Just dive straight into those sweet owls! D: Though a black cat is quite cool. D: Screech owl, (P: Tawny) tawny owl… I’m gonna go with screech owl.
P: Screech? [chuckles] D: Yep. Definitely. Tag yourself.
P: Okay. D: Me and annoying noises.
P Won’t be in the same room as you at night. P: Screeeech P: What are you looking forward to learning at Hogwarts? D: Hmmm.. I could apparate to the fridge.. That would be pretty dank. (P: Yeah?) D: I could transfigurate my furniture INTO the fridge. That’d be pretty dank.
P: [chuckles] Just turn everything into a fridge. D: I like secrets about the castle
P: Yeah? D: because to be honest, from what we know about Harry Potter, you find one like mystical book or a secret sword and then you’re basically, like, godlike powers D: So I’m definitely gonna go about that.
P: Alright we’ll chose that. P: That makes you–
D: There is some shady stuff happening in that school. P: That makes you the main character of the story, though. You’re probably gonna get killed by Voldemort. D: Yeah that’s gonna make be the Ginny, but that’s fine, (P: Alright) I’ll spend some quality time with Tom. P: Awww! Secrets about the castle! D: T-Tom is Voldemort, Phil.
P: Oh. [laughs] P: [dramatically] Once every century, the Flutterby bush (D: Ugh!) produces flowers that adapt their scent to attract the unwary. P: If it lured you, (D: Okay) it would smell of: D: A crackling log fire. Oh my god this is like a scented candle quiz right now.
P: Ooo! Yeah! P: This is your candle haul.
D: That’s Fireside Treats right there. P: The sea.
D: Mmm. I do like the sea, yeah. P: Fresh parchment?
D: Mmm. Okay. P: What does that even smell like?
D: I don’t know? P: Mmm. Paper
D: Mmm. Yeah. P: Dusty libraries. P: Or home?
D: Disgusting. P: The rat’s nest. [chuckles]
D: Wood fire. P: You’re going for the wood fire?
D: Droppings and desolation. Yes. P: That’s very–Uhh I think I’d choose that too. P: Black or white? [crickets chirping] P: Black! P: Are you ready, Dan?
D: Okay, I’m ready! P: Results are in! [Legend of Zelda treasure chest sound]
P: GRYFFINDOR! D: Really?!
P: What?! I’m shocked by that! D: The first time I did it I got Slytherin! P: Maybe you’ve changed! (D: [sputtering]) You’ve become more of a.. soft lad! D: I am Harry Potter.
P: You are literally Harry Potter. D: It’s like, “You’re Slytherin,” and then it’s like, “Ehhh.. maybe Gryffindor.”
P: Yeah. D: My god, what does this mean?
P: I dunno! D: It means I’m one of those, like, grumpy Gryffindors
P: Yeah. D: who’s just, like, not a team player. (P: Oh no!) Why are you in Gryffindor unless you’re an extravert? D: You’re supposed to join the Quidditch team if you’re in Gryffindor! D: But then if I was in Slytherin people would be like, “Okay, like, you think you’re edgy and cool like us, but you’re not.” P: Wow.
D: So I’m stuck in the middle. P: I’d watch that movie. Danny Potter. P: And I’m the palest person in the world, so I’m secretly Voldemort in the end. [dramatic music]
P: AVADA KEDAVRA! D: Yeah you do, and you have a nose that looks like snake slits from the front, so I think that’s quite appro– D: Oh yeah sor– Mlehhh! [dies] P: Plot twist! [dramatic music]
P: AVADA KEDAVRA! D: Mate.
P: The Internet’s destroyed. D: They’re here to watch our videos, don’t kill them.
P: [chuckles] Alright! P: Well there we go!
D: Well there we go! P: That was Pottermore!
D: I hope that was informati– D: I mean, before everyone says it, yes! We know the results can change depending on what questions you get and whatever (P: Yeah) D: But [sputters] trust the hat! P: If there’s any other games you want us to play during Gamingmas, leave them in the comments below!
D: [singing] Down below! P: Give us a thumbs up
D: if you enjoyed this
P: or I’ll cast a spell on ya! D: Okay, wow don’t threaten them, (P: [chuckles]) just make them come back ’cause they want to! P: Check out our last video over there (D: MM! [points]) which way is it?! This way! P: We looked after some lynxes. It was a big trauma.
D: [strained] Don’t watch the last video haha! P: Big Mood. Uh you can subscribe to our channels below or subscribe to the gaming channel. D: I’m gonna go apparate to a fridge. Bye!
P: Bye! See you tomorrow! D: [sneezes]
P: Oh no! I cast a sneezing spell on you!

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